Here’s some fun things that came across my email today.

Girls are like finals because:
-you’d rather get an easy one.
-you get in a lot of trouble if you get caught cheating on one.
-if you are drunk when you do one, it takes a lot longer to finish.
-the less they have on them the better.
-they suck and/or blow.
-when you finish one, you have to immediately start preparing for the next one.
-if you have more than one scheduled at the same time, you have a problem.
-you have to put in a lot of effort for very little reward.
-nothing about them makes any f*&%ing sense.
-they just lie there and you have to do all the work.
-when you are done you get up and leave.
-good curves make for a more enjoyable experience

and haikus about Las Vegas!

Hot desert oasis,
filled with sin and temptation,
beckons my money.

Always double down
when your hand shows eleven.
Hope for a face card.

craps craps craps craps craps
craps craps craps craps craps craps craps
craps craps craps craps craps

come out extra bet
don’t say eleven say yo
and throw a nickle

always double odds?
on four and ten because they?
pay well and win field

come on double two
lots of chips at stake so I
go home rich. aw crap.

always split aces?
and eights, never five or tens
unless you have balls

hey cocktail lady!
please bring me a jack and coke?
Big tits get big tips

eyelids drooping, cash
run low. Vegas best feature:
there is no last call