Prepping for the Open House, I was poking around the www.dps.uiuc.edu site. I found they have a page that lists the recent crime reports… and they mean recent. This must be from the same sources (at least for campus) that the DI gets its blotter.

Marc massaged it through some pipes to get an RSS feed of the UofI DPS crime reports.

It proves for entertaining reading. Such as:

An unknown person(s) poured two bottles of laundry detergent in the fountain near the Admissions and Records Building, 901 W. Illinois St., U. sometime after midnight on July 21. Staff estimated the costs of labor and de-foaming agents for clean-up at $300.

Yes, that’s bad — but think of how “green” they were being, doing their laundry outside.

A construction worker paid restitution ($186) for breaking a wood parking arm in a lot at Assembly Hall, 1800 S. First St., C. on July 7. According to the report, the man drove his truck across a pedestrian walkway to enter the parking lot without paying the fee and struck the arm. A witness recorded the truck’s license number and the incident also was captured by a surveillance camera. When interviewed by police, the man agreed to pay for the damage and the $5 parking fee.

And best yet:

Dumbass1, 22, of U. and Dumbass2, 21, of Paxton (not their real names) were arrested on a charge of criminal trespass to state-supported property on July 14. At 2:05 a.m. Urbana and U. of I. police responded to a call of a burglary in progress and a report of suspects on the roof of the Bread Co. building. Dumbass1 was arrested after an U. officer identified him as the suspect he had seen on the roof of Krannert Center for the Performing Arts, 500 S. Goodwin Avenue, U. a few minutes later. Dumbass2 was arrested at about 2:36 a.m. when a U. of I. officer saw him walking with a woman on the west side of KCPA. According to the report, the officer became suspicious because Dumbass2 was not wearing a shirt, shoes or socks and was covered with dirt.

So, enjoy!